Not wearing clothes is not demoting yourself, wearing clothes is demoting yourself.

I have realized a large trend on ourWorld, and that is girls and boys alike are being seductive. It is not just girls anymore changing their normal clothes into swim suits in December because ourWorld has decided that the island does not and cannot have enough "sexiness". Now it can't just be girls who go barely clothed or change their names into things like: hot4hotdog, CallMeMaybBB, 2Hot4TeddyBear, 2Hot4Underwear, UnderwearSevxiCheeta, CougarMomaRawr. It has to be boys too, except their names are more like: HawtLongD, xxXcxiibobxxXx, mydhrd4u, swaggied, cxiiyolo, jerseyshurswagx.

If you want to learn how to be a respected member of this society and fit in, you have come to the right site.

Include information about your private area. Make sure that your username is not readable. For example: IAmTheDMan becomes iiAmDeeDeemanx3. The more unreadable, the better. Your goal is to confuse people as much as possible. It isn't about the content of your username, it is about how it looks, and yours looks just like croc butter.

While we're at it, throw in something about love too. 3iLuvvtacobellNJeniixx should do it.

In fact, wear as little as possible. So little that even the ourWorld given lingerie seems more than what you're wearing. Remember: you are a respected member of society and no one can tell you what to do because you live by a hash tag.

Use a lot of grammar that contains "u", "babez", "bb", "plz". Stick the letter "Z" in anywhere to make the word look rad- "schzwl". Pretend that your space bar is not working too. If the person you're talking to has trouble reading what you're typing, you have done your job right. If the other person has to go on urbandictionary.com to realize what you're saying, you have done your job wrong. Make sure you type with a lot of swag to the point that Urban Dictionary cannot interpret what you're saying. That is because your swag is too much for one website to handle. In fact, it's too much for the whole internet to handle, which is also why no one can understand what you're typing to them.

If you are reading this and if you find anything offensive, you are right. I am just a jealous of you. I am jealous I can't be a respected member of the island society. To make your future kid's friends jealous, take a screenshot of you doing everything the three cards said to do. Save it, and show it to your future kids. That way they know that they had a cool mom/dad. In fact, show it to all of their friends! The more, the merrier. I will start.